Saturday, March 30, 2013

Be Your Own Beloved #20

Every day, I am taking a self-portrait in conjunction with Vivienne McMaster's Be Your Own Beloved e-course. Sometimes it takes me longer - like a week or more, but I'm dedicated to finishing this project!

Taking Self-Portraits in a Public Space

Seventeen days later... I bet you thought I'd given up on this project, didn't you? To be perfectly frank, I think some part of me thought I had given up to. The next assignment for this self-portrait project is to document a moment in which we leave our comfort zones. Throughout this project, I have been pushing my boundaries and doing things that scare me, so when I came to this assignment, I felt totally paralyzed. You mean I have to do something even more scarier? I was completely stumped. In the meantime, I did parade around as Lady Pope in downtown San Francisco, but ironically, that was not that scary for me. When I'm in costume, I'm virtually unshakable.

Last night, my husband surprised me with a nice dinner at a new restaurant called Backyard, in Forestville, CA. We've been experiencing some almost-rain clouds for a few days and the light has been gorgeous for picture-taking. I had also recently been a big shopping trip with one of my "Fatshionista" heroes and had gotten some really amazing new outfits at some ridiculously low prices. As a fat woman, I am really empowered when I see other fat people rocking their own unique style and I have been wanting to document my outfits more to add to that wonderful, empowering world.


Wooden bark platter of pickled yummies at Backyard!

Next to the restaurant was a little corner market with this wonderful mural on the side (I just love "Where the River Meets the Redwoods" - that's where I live and I love it!). "Perfect," I thought. "We can take my outfit picture here!" As my husband starting taking pictures, I noticed that a lot of people had stopped to look at us. Did we look like stupid tourists? Did they wonder why anyone would want to take a picture of a fat lady in front of an old mural? I started to feel extremely self-conscious. And then I realized, "Hey! I'm fulfilling my next self-portrait assignment! I am totally out of my comfort zone, right now!"

I love that you can see the nervousness in my face and yet you can also see that I am fully committed to taking these photos, being seen, and enjoying it, to the best of my ability. I was surprised to see that the vulnerability in this picture makes it even more beautiful!

And for my fellow Fatshionistas, here are the details of my outfit!

Top - Beverly Drive (a Sear's outlet score at $3!)
Skirt - Sejour (Nordstrom Rack score at $15!)
Leggings - Domino Dollhouse (Some of the best leggings for big-legged ladies!)
Boots - Harley Davidson (scored them BRAND NEW at a yard sale for $30!)
Purse - Simply Vera by Vera Wang (scored at Kohls for half-off, just $50!)

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