6 Months of Grief Project: Day 39

Power Love Sex Magic

This is Day 39 of my #6MonthsOfGrief Project. To learn more about this practice, feel free to visit Day One, where I explain this project in more detail.

There are many seemingly taboo discussions in the land of Widows and one of them seems to be sex. When does a widow venture out into the world of dating again? When is it okay to have sex again? Sex and passion and creativity are all intimately(!) linked for me. I was lucky enough to have an sweet, sexy connection with a close friend a few months after the passing of my husband, but I definitely had my worries and fears about intimacy happening "too soon." I certainly could not have had a new relationship with anyone, but with an old friend - it felt easy and comfortable.

As I move forward into my new life, I have wondered about dating. What the heck is that going to be like? How does one date in 2016? Are there any single people over the age of 40? Who would want to date a widow? I really wish there was a place to frankly talk about these questions without any kind of shame or judgment. Is there such a place?

PLEASE NOTE: I am currently in Big Sur, where internet access is spotty at best, so postings may be sporadic for a bit. Please know that I'm okay and creating an image every day, even if I can't always share it with you.

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I am very aware that this project can bring up a lot around yours or other's grief and loss, I will always follow every post with some online grief support resources that have helped me. Please feel free to let me know of online support that you have found healing in your grief, as well:

Art with Grief:

• Photographer [Sarah Treanor] Takes Moving Self-Portraits to Cope with Her Fiance's Death by Jillian Wong
• When the Fall Comes, a film about Grief by Adriana Marchione
• Self-Portraits: Expressing Emotion Through Art on What's Your Grief?
• The Hard Romance of Grief by Mark Liebenow
• The poetry of John O’Donohue

Resources for Widows:

• Camp Widow

• Soaring Spirits International

Living with Grief Resources:

• Modern Loss's excellent resource list
• Grief Bibliography on Grief Healing

• Teresa “TL” Bruce's What to Say When Someone Dies
• They Brought Cookies: For A New Widow, Empathy Eases Death's Pain by Ann Finkbeiner on NPR
• A Field Guide to Getting Lost by Rebecca Solnit

• Megan Devine’s Refuge in Grief

• The Geography of Sorrow: Francis Weller on Navigating Our Loses, interviewed by Tim McKee in Sun Magazine

• How to Be a Friend in Deed by Bruce Feiler in the New York Times

• 12 Things to Know About the First Year of Grieving Someone You Can’t Live Without by Laurie Costanza in Elephant Magazine

And remember, I am sharing this project on a variety of platforms, including my Instagram, Twitter, & Facebook feeds, as well as my Pinterest page on Grief. I use the hashtag #6MonthsOfGrief, so it can easily be found on any platform. Please share this project with anyone you think might need it.

Thank you, and (hopefully) see you tomorrow.